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Making decisions is a complex process that uses a lot of executive function skills. This can be especially difficult for people with ADHD and can lead to “analysis paralysis,” or getting stuck on making a choice.
ADHD coach Jaye Lin reacts to a quote on analysis paralysis from Emily’s ADHD Aha! podcast episode. Listen for some tips and tools that can help you unfreeze and act.
Jaye: How do you feel about the choices you have to make throughout the day? What about the constant decisions of what to do next? Do you find yourself frozen when you're faced with decision-making, not able to make a choice or move forward? Turns out this is common for a lot of us with ADHD.
This is "Tips from an ADHD coach," and I'm your coach, Jaye Lin. Today we're talking about how sometimes the urge to find the absolute best choice can lead to analysis paralysis. We're going to hear from Emily, who was on another Understood.org podcast, "ADHD Aha!," about her experience with analysis paralysis.
Emily: I have never felt that part, the analysis paralysis so strongly as, you know, when I had my kids. Their nap times were like torture for me because I think every single nap time they had. I immediately went into that analysis paralysis, exhausted, can't do anything, didn't do anything. Just like spin cycle.
It's like they go to nap when they're really little, you have no idea how much time you're going to have. So, that's like your first challenge, right? Do I have 20 minutes? Do I have 40 minutes? You're exhausted. You just want to sit down for a minute.
But sitting down for a minute for me meant sitting down for the remainder, but not relaxing, not taking an intentional "I'm tired. I need to do nothing while they nap. So I'm sitting here on the couch." It was not an intentional decision. It was "I would like to sit down for five minutes and then do something."
But the five minutes of quote-unquote rest turns into, "Are they going to wake up in 20 minutes? Do I have two hours? Do I have laundry to do? Should I do the dishes? Should I organize stuff?" And then I get so exhausted in those five minutes and then I'm like, well, now I only maybe have 15 minutes. So, it's just, it was such a cycle.
Jaye: I'm childless, so I can't even imagine what this was like for Emily. She's trying to make the most of her time as a new mother, totally exhausted and still feeling like she needs to squeeze productivity into every spare moment she gets. Feeling overwhelmed with all of it. And I know that's what it's like to be a mother because there's always so much to do. My heart really goes out to her and all the ADHD moms out there.
While analysis paralysis can happen to anyone, it can be stronger and more frequent for those of us with ADHD. The decision-making process can look very different between ADHD brains and neurotypical brains. The lower executive function we have means that we're less able to hold multiple things in our heads at the same time for long periods.
I often use the example of my neurotypical friends and family members asking me why there's so much trash in my car. They always wonder why I don't take the individual pieces of trash I have out every time I leave the car. Well, it's because I have one priority in my head at a time. If I'm going to get my prescription filled, I'm driving to CVS, getting out of my car, and walking to the pharmacy section of the store.
For my neurotypical loved ones, they're able to carry all of those tasks in their heads at the same time. Get themselves to the pharmacy counter, or pay attention to what's in their car so they can tidy up and take out the trash. Be aware of the trash cans in the vicinity. For me, any side roads I take threaten the chance of me following through with completing my tasks. So I need to keep my focus on getting that one thing done. Fill my prescription.
So, when Emily gets the kids down for a nap, there might not be an existing priority list in her head ready for her to attack the most important thing on the list. This means that she has to work out the priorities for what she should be doing after that time comes. But another thing that can happen is a drop in stimulation that makes executive function even more difficult.
While the kids are awake, there's a good amount of alertness that is required from her. She is attending to her kids, paying attention to what they're doing so that they don't get into danger, and sticking to their daily routines. Once the kids are down for their nap, all of that takes a dip and she is in a much lower state of adrenaline, dopamine, and other brain chemicals that boost executive function for ADHD brains.
So, when it's time for Emily to make those decisions, she's not in the best capacity to do so. But she is under a lot of stress to get things done. She knows she doesn't have that much time, and she starts panicking about what she can do in that time. She tries to come up with the absolute best, most ideal task to do. I call this optimizing.
Emily's optimizing prevents her from getting started on things right away because she has to take the time to figure out what's the most ideal choice for her current situation. This is something we ADHD folk tend to do a lot, and it might not just be because we have a lot to do in a short amount of time.
Optimizing tends to be common for a lot of us because brainstorming the best option tends to boost our dopamine levels. So, it can be a habit for us to do this every time we have to make decisions. But after we're in high dopamine and adrenaline states like Emily is when her kids are awake, our bodies need to recover.
So, while optimizing can boost dopamine in bursts of "go time" for us, doing it after high stimulation periods doesn't quite have the same effect. It can drain whatever brainpower we have left, leaving us without much motivating energy to follow through on doing things.
As Emily is optimizing, the clock keeps ticking down. She gets more and more stressed and more and more exhausted. The optimum task she decided on might not be possible to do now with what time she has left, and she has to start the process of optimizing all over again, repeating it again and again until there's no time left to actually do anything.
And then what? I can't fully assume, but it seems like she doesn't feel great about her lack of productivity during that time. And even though she didn't get any tasks done, she also wasn't able to use that time to rest and recharge. Not only was she unproductive, but she's even more tired than she was to begin with. And the next time her kids are down for a nap, the list of things she has to get done is even longer, and the analysis paralysis is even harder. It's a really cruel cycle.
So, what can we do if we are in Emily's position, when we only have tiny pockets of time to get too many things done, and we're tired from being in high-stimulation states for most of the day? Well, we can get that priority list ready, so we don't need to think about what to do first when that time comes. I can't emphasize this enough. This is best done outside of our heads.
While we are going through the day and recognize tasks that we need to do, write it down. Figure out the priority and the order things need to be done in before it's time to start doing them. If you're starting out with doing this, I would suggest getting some Post-it notes. Write each task down on a Post-it note, along with an estimate for how long it will take. Prioritize the Post-it note tasks as you add each one in and move them around as needed.
If you're having a hard time with figuring out priority, I find the Eisenhower Decision Matrix to be a great tool. The Eisenhower Decision Matrix is used to determine urgency and importance for tasks. Urgency for how quickly the deadline is approaching, and importance for how critical it is for the task to be done. For each task, place the Post-it note on the matrix. Tasks get placed further to the left the more urgent they are and higher to the top the more important they are.
So, the top left will have the most important and urgent tasks, and the bottom right will have the least important and least urgent tasks. Don't worry, we will have a link to the Eisenhower Decision Matrix in the show notes.
So, in Emily's example, if she has to do laundry today, or there will be no underwear or burp cloths that are cleaned by the next nap, laundry will be at the top left corner. It's extremely important and urgent. If laundry can last for another day or two, then it would probably still be close to the top because it's still important to do, but it would be more to the right because it's not that urgent.
And her task of organizing her stuff, I don't want to assume, because what is important for all of us is different, but my guess is it would be at the bottom right corner for not urgent and not important.
If you're using the Eisenhower Decision Matrix when it's "go time," start with the top left corner of most important and urgent tasks, then work your way across the top of the important tasks. I usually suggest only looking at one task at a time. We are only effective at doing one thing at a time and you'd already know the priority.
Try your best to take that Post-it at the top left corner and start doing it without looking at anything else. Another way ADHD can affect what's happening with Emily is that executive dysfunction makes it harder to switch contexts and modes, so it can be harder for us to switch from a high-intensity task, like getting an assignment done right before it's due, to a lower intensity task, like tidying up our desks.
And it might be harder to go from a solitary mode, like doing our laundry, to a social mode like having coffee with friends. Emily's ADHD might make it harder to go straight from caring for her kids to tackling chores on her own. It might be helpful for Emily to signal the switch to her body.
I do this by announcing what I'm doing next, even when I'm by myself, saying something like, "Time to crush this to-do list" can make the transition easier for me. This challenge with switching modes also applies to the transition out of Emily's resting time. She is tired and says she's going to sit down for five minutes. Once her body is in rest mode, it's pretty hard to get out of it because of that difficulty switching modes.
Also, her body and brain need rest. She knows it. We know it. If we don't give ourselves a break, our brains will force one. It sounds like her body is signaling that she needs to rest and she is not allowing herself to have that need met. Usually, when we say we need to sit down for five minutes, we need to sit down for much longer than five minutes.
New mothers are often told to rest when their babies rest, which makes logical sense. When babies are not resting, moms typically are also not resting, and rest is a necessary human need. Try not to shame or guilt yourself during rest time, because resting when we need it makes us function so much better afterward.
Feeling crappy about relaxing tends to lower the benefits from using that time, so feeling good about resting is actually quite productive. Also, breathing exercises, stretches, self-massages, and simply closing our eyes can accelerate our recovery. So if rest time is limited, it might be helpful to try those techniques to better ensure you can bounce back.
If you felt an emotional reaction to what I just said about moms resting when their babies are resting, it's for a good reason. I know it's not always possible to rest, especially as women who have to do it all, especially as moms. Sometimes there are too many urgent and important things to do and not enough time to do them.
If this is the case, I suggest tackling the most important and urgent tasks on the list before giving yourself the chance to sit down, since getting back up might be a struggle. This might also lower the anxiety levels if you do end up resting after getting some things done, knowing that you have done all the critical things you need to do during that period of time.
Analysis paralysis can be extremely frustrating and more common for those of us with ADHD. Executive dysfunction can make it hard for us to keep priority lists in our heads all the time, so it's common for us to have to do a lot of the decision-making when it's already time to start doing things. But when we are going from high-stimulation states to this period of doing, we have a lower capacity to make decisions.
We can also have a habit of optimizing, which further drains our brainpower and needs to be repeated as available time ticks down. Also, difficulty switching contexts and modes means that when we sit down, it's hard to get back up. It's even harder to get back up after periods of exhaustion since our bodies and brains need rest to recover.
By working out our priority lists while we're still in high-stimulation states, getting the most important and urgent tasks done before we sit down, and actually allowing ourselves to rest when we're exhausted, we can be so much more successful in our decision-making and task completion. Oh, and moms are remarkable, but you already knew that. Thanks for listening.
You've been listening to "Tips from an ADHD coach" on the Understood Podcast Network. If you have a challenge that you'd like me to talk about on air or would just like to say hi, you can email us at ADHDCoachTips@understood.org. You can also check out the show notes to find links to anything mentioned in the show and more resources.
This show is brought to you by Understood.org. Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. Learn more at Understood.org.
"Tips from an ADHD coach" is produced and edited by Jessamine Molli y and Margie DeSantis. Our theme music was written by Justin D. Wright, who also mixes the show. Ilana Millner is our supervising producer, Brianna Berry is our production director, and Neil Drumming is our editorial director. For Understood.org, our executive directors are Laura Key, Scott Cocchiere, and Seth Melnick. And I'm your host, Jaye Lin. Thanks for listening.
(@catieosaurus) is a certified sex educator, and mental health advocate. She is currently one of the foremost influencers on ADHD.
is a clinical psychologist and owner of Kind Mind Psychology, a private practice specializing in evidence-based approaches to treating a wide range of mental health issues.
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